New Beginnings
Symbols seem to present themselves in clusters. Life has been amazingly good to me in the past 3 months. I weathered change and faced horrible realities and recognized that I was finding myself, or somewhere along the way had already found myself. I welcomed new and old loves, found and lost relationships, but all in moderation, never dangling on the verge of foolish passion or destructive heartbreak. Everyday was a banquet, in every way.
You know that Nick-at-Nite commercial where they layer tons of facial hair on Brian Bonsall until Andy Keaton looks like Bruce Vilanche -- well, don't you just think that's really funny? The creative team behind Nick-at-Nite is inspired.
I rolled out in La Jolla today with Mathieu and we came across this fantastic find. It is Mission Coffee Cup and it is officially my favorite San Diego eatery. It seems like a groovy diner with all the basics but it's actually a hip, efficient, and innovative Mecca of high protein, lowfat, low carb entrees with fresh and savory flavor. The portions are both decorated and substantial, and the prices are reasonable. I desperately need something like this to introduce me back into healthy eating, after the loss of control in Europe and being so busy that I just let anything enter my digestive tract. Zone eating is so important to me -- it's become a part of my lifestyle and has had such a positive effect on the way I live and run my body. I realized that when I ate yummy but fatty foods I generally became cranky because I felt gross and chubs; and then I would be depressed, because I just felt heavy, disappointed in myself for not being able to resist, and my energy levels were out of whack. But when I'm eating well, my energy is up and I am motivated to do a thousand things. Dance class and the gym always seem invigorating and dressing in the morning is fun; and then the days just seem sunnier and move more quickly because I feel lithe and agile. Taking care of your body is the best pick-me-up.
Hanging out with Mathieu has kept my mind off of certain things. He's actually from Clermont-Ferrand which is where Volvic water is from! That's so funny considering Jose and I exclusively imbibe the stuff after Francesca told us it was THE thing for Londoners. However, Mathieu is totally Parisian and so has a sarcastic comment for everything. He raises one eyebrow in disdain for most things; and while it can be infuriating, it really adds a new comedic angle to things we are looking at. He makes me miss Europe, even if French and Italian societies are mutually adversarial. I'm starting to really appreciate the French perspective: the guys responsible for Western democracy and intellectual property, not to mention Saint-Saens and Massenet, must be up to something good.
Today he was admiring a thin and curvy sun-kissed blonde at the law school, lamenting the shame that as an American girl she had no access to fashionable shoes (platform flip-flops just don't do it for French guys), but ultimately lauding the fact that she was a "living cliche."
At lunch he was teaching me how to pronounce "Chanel" the cool way. Emphasize the A and E sounds.
Tomorrow I am coercing Mathieu to go snorkeling with me.
Brown Eyes
It's a song on Destiny's Child Survivor, and today it was the soundtrack to my life for about 4 minutes.
I was tied up for a couple of days and when I came back the whole apartment was empty. All of Meghan's stuff was gone. So then, today, Rhiannon moved in. Everything happened quite unceremoniously, but what can I say... at least it was a totally non-fuss situation.
Some highlights from the weekend, mostly unintelligible to anybody who hasn't spoken with me personally, recently:
1.
Endcap suite. Panorama, a million lights, internet access.
2.
Banana ice. A winning combination of graham cracker, vanilla ice cream, caramelized bananas, and frozen banana. Simple originality.
3.
Red tie-up pumps from Italy with a billowing beige top. Someone to help you with the laces. "Quando ci vedono, vogliono vomitare." "Vogliono essere al posto mio."
I wonder if I have an ulcer.
Girls Just Wanna Have Fun
I actually think girls want something a little more profound than that. Fun is transitory. Fun is not very fulfilling. I know that Cyndi Lauper did not intend to be terribly deep with those lyrics. It was the 80's, we just wanted a good beat to jump around to in our leg-warmers and ruffled stonewashed denim skirts.
The past two days have been pretty stressful for me. Moot Court called and what was originally intended to be a "couple hours of research" turned into hundreds of pages of legal reading. Do they know who they are entrusting the foundation of the Criminal Procedure tournament with?
I feel like I am not really in control of my mind or my emotions. I feel that there is a sad poetic justice to things and am surprised that I am handling it with wry amusement, and see the rightness of it. As usual, I revel in delusions of grandeur, of my own nobility, of my own steely will, maybe all to fight off the mounting suspicion that I am in fact just really weak and tired and ready to crumble.
I said before, "I am sick of acting brave." Yesterday I sat in my bed feeling that I had never been as insulted in all my life.
Last night I had a really disturbing dream, where Debbie caught some bad British virus and her eyeballs were hanging out on Slinky springs and she was all kinds of primary colors. She looked like a Venus flytrap or some Nickelodeon cartoon. I'm really sorry, Debbie, I do not imagine you like that at all, but my subconscious is all out of whack, and I think it had a lot to do with Reyna telling me she saw you at Delphi and you looked great, and then you know the virus was a British thing, so of course you were the number one suspect... Worth mentioning also that I had a bit too much red wine last night and that had a controlling factor on my psyche.
The Saga Never Ends
It's beautiful when a person takes the opportunity to search out what might have been.
I really can't believe how charmed my life has become in the last 2 years. Rare and special things have happened in my life, things I could have never anticipated, things I dreamed up just because they were improbable.
I received a marvelous gift: a pair of lace-up red flats with pointed toes, that should look interesting and very chic with the right skirt.
I'm back in the Zone and I'm very happy about that. San Diego weather has been incredibly agreeable lately and the days are the perfect length.
Cartier perfume smells like something a wrinkled heiress would wear. Like Barbara Hutton, I guess.
I've Arrived
Yesterday, at approximately 1:05 PM,
I finally felt like a dancer.
It was Jessy's class at Academy of Performing Arts. She's on Culture Shock San Diego. We were doing a lyrical piece for Janet Jackson's "Let's Wait Awhile" and for the first time, I really felt like I was dancing, not just learning, or trailing behind in class, or improving, or feeling the ropes. It was such a great feeling, and it lifted me up for the rest of the day.
Bruce has been hanging out in San Diego, because he will join us at USD Law this year. Bruce is a great lunch and dinner companion because we like the same cuisines. Last night, Po, Bruce, and I had some spiritual libation at the Turf Club and then Nunu's. Too much Ketelone Cran.
Domani, domani, domani! Ci incontriamo di nuovo!
