Wednesday, June 09, 2004

Black Handbags Are Lame

I was having tea today with Miss Melanie and Miss Paige, and during a lull when some delicate little sandwiches were being gently laid onto my plate, it struck me that black handbags are lame. Handbags overall are the kind of marvelous fancy that tempt a girl's wildest imagination, her pocketbook, and the very thing that threatens to overturn the most carefully plotted of budgets. It's the kind of glorious accessory for which you can take all kinds of artistic license. Your chance to break the rules. And because of this, I encourage every girl out there to go and get the green one. Try the pink. Come on, get a red one just as Hermes envisioned for Grace Kelly. That's the thing that you can express your personality with. The thing that "pops."

So while I'm on the subject, may I just vent about how something "popping" seems to be the happening event of the season. "You want to get something like this, because it will really pop." "Why don't you wear white? That will make that scarf just pop." I've heard it on TV -- on countless makeover and design shows -- and I've heard it in real life, out of the mouths of my own friends. Who thought this shit up and who is the celeb that verbalized it for every damn magazine and fashionista to run away with? But it isn't just fashion, it's stuff like crazy rugs in living rooms and vibrant paint scrolls on neutral-colored walls. Please, everybody, let's stop making things "pop." I notice that words are in vogue as much as clothing trends and J.Lo/Lola's significant other(s) are, and let's bury "pop" away quickly. I am still trying to figure out when everything became "passive aggressive" or "bling bling."

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